From the archive: Foreign mothers, foreign tongues: ‘In another universe, she could have been my friend’

从档案中:外国母亲,异国语言:“在另一个宇宙里,她本可以成为我的朋友”

The Audio Long Read

2026-04-15

35 分钟
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单集简介 ...

We are raiding the Guardian long read archives to bring you some classic pieces from years past, with new introductions from the authors. This week, from 2023: Having grown up in different cultures with different expectations, my mother and I have often clashed. But as my daughter grows older, I have come to see our relationship in a different light Written and read by Dina Nayeri. Help support our independent journalism at theguardian.com/longreadpod
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  • This is The Guardian.

  • The Guardian Archive Long Read.

  • Hi, my name is Dina Nayeri and I'm the author of Foreign Mothers, Foreign Tongues.

  • In Another Universe, She Could Have Been My Friend, which was published in The Guardian Long Read in 2023.

  • Well, this was a personal essay that I wrote about my relationship with my mother and how it's evolved over the years.

  • My mother and I were both born in Iran and we left when she was in her 30s and I was eight.

  • And so there was this kind of widening culture gap that formed over the decades as I became a Western woman.

  • She remained an Iranian woman and, you know,

  • her expectations of what motherhood would mean to an adult daughter and my expectations as an American and then

  • how those carried forward when I became a mother.

  • I wrote the piece because, you know, obviously there were so many sort of memories that came up when I became a mother

  • about the kind of mother that I experienced and because we were refugees and displaced.

  • My formative years were really majorly trauma years.

  • And so I was a little worried when I became a mom.

  • But I think this particular topic really came up when we moved to France in 2019.

  • And my daughter was put in a French school.

  • She was only three years old.

  • And instantly she learned French and had this accent and sort of assimilated so quickly as children do.

  • And then she started looking at me as the foreign mother.

  • And it reminded me.