Is it OK to disagree

Introduction Do you find you generally have the same opinions as your friends, or different? And are you able to keep calm if someone says something you disagree with? Neil and Beth discuss this and teach you some new vocabulary. This week's question According to a recent Ipsos poll, what percentage of the British population believes society is divided? a) 20% b) 50% c) 80% Listen to the programme to hear the answer. Vocabulary divided in disagreement; not together   aroused feel a strong emotion like anger or disagreement   motivational something that makes us determined and enthusiastic   heat an intense feeling, often anger   open-minded willing to listen to and consider new ideas   silver bullet a simple solution to a complicated problem TRANSCRIPT Note: This is not a word-for-word transcript.  Neil Hello, this is 6 Minute English from BBC Learning English. I'm Neil.   Beth And I'm Beth. Neil, when you're chatting with friends, do you usually have the same or different opinion on things going on in the world?   Neil Ooh... well, that's interesting. I think I probably have quite similar opinions and that's, kind of, why we're friends.   Beth Ah! Well, we might like to believe that we're accepting and tolerant of others' beliefs, but for many people it can be difficult to communicate with people who have very different opinions to our own. And this lack of acceptance could be increasing with our use of social media. For example, algorithms tend to show us what we already like and agree with.   Neil Of course, we can't always agree with everyone else. We all have personal opinions and beliefs on topics like religion and politics. But some worry that it's becoming more and more common to react with violence when they disagree, than to solve disagreements together peacefully.   Beth So, are we becoming a more divided society? Divided means in disagreement with and separated from others – to not be together. And how can we be more accepting and open to the opinions of others? That's what we'll be discussing in this programme and, as usual, we'll be learning some useful new words and phrases. Remember, you can find all the vocabulary from this programme on our website, bbclearningenglish.com.   Neil But first I have a question for you, Beth. According to a recent Ipsos poll, what percentage of the British population believes society is divided? Is it:   a)    20%, b)    50%, or c)    80%? Beth Ooh... I'm going to say 50%.   Neil Well, we'll find out the answer later in the programme. Paul Dolan, professor of behavioural science at the London School of Economics, thinks we should learn how to control our emotions and be open to discussions when we disagree. Here, he explains more about how to do this on BBC World Service programme All in the Mind:   Paul Dolan Generally, we're going to be making better decisions, and more respectfully, if we calm down. I mean, one of the things that people could do on their social media is have a five-minute delay before sending it. It takes 15 minutes when you're proper aroused for the amygdala to calm down, but within a few seconds it can start calming down, right? You take a deep breath and you start feeling calmer. It's not to say that always being calm is good. Anger can be motivational and positive emotions actually can be very good for us. Generally, people make better decisions and are more engaging and more open when they're happier, but much of the time it will be just a case of calming down to try and take some of the heat out of the environment.   Beth Paul thinks we should take time to calm down when we feel aroused, which here means to feel anger or strong disagreement. He said it takes 15 minutes for the amygdala, the part of the brain that experiences emotions, to calm down when we're aroused.   Neil While anger can be motivational – make us more determined and enthusiastic – Paul says people can speak more openly when they're happier, when heat is taken out of the environment. Heat in this context means an intense feeling like anger.   Beth Now, one recent dating experiment looked into what people say they want in an ideal partner according to their dating profile. Researchers found that many single people included details on things like what they want their partner to look like, their height, the political party they vote for, but many also say they want a partner who is open-minded and tolerant of different views. If you are open-minded, you're willing to listen to and consider new ideas.   Neil However, the researchers concluded that while people want a partner to be open-minded and tolerant, they don't want to be very open-minded themselves. So, how can we be more open to getting to know people that we might disagree with? Here's Paul Dolan again, talking to presenter Claudia Hammond of BBC World Service's All in the Mind.   Paul Dolan So, I guess one very obvious answer is to get offline. I mean, to actually just get out more and meet people because it's what political scientists think is the silver bullet. You know, the more you're around people that are different, the more you realise that actually they're not that different, and you become more tolerant and open-minded. So, being around people that are different – I think that's probably the way that we're going to tackle that problem.   Neil Paul says political scientists think the silver bullet is to get offline and meet people. A silver bullet means a simple solution to a complicated problem. By meeting people who have different opinions and beliefs to you, the more you'll realise they're not that different to you at all.   Beth And that could make you more accepting and lead to a society that is less divided. And speaking of divided, isn't it time you revealed the answer to your question, Neil?   Neil Yes, I asked, "What percentage of the British population believes society is divided, according to a recent poll by the organisation Ipsos?"   Beth I said 50%. Was that correct?   Neil It was not correct. It is in fact 80%.   Beth Wow, that's a lot!   Neil OK. Let's recap the vocabulary we've learned in this programme, starting with divided, which means in disagreement – not together.   Beth Aroused means feel a strong emotion like anger. Neil If something is motivational, it makes us determined and enthusiastic. Beth Heat means an intense feeling, like anger. Neil If you are open-minded, you are willing to listen to and consider new ideas. Beth And finally, a silver bullet means a simple solution to a complicated problem. Once again, our six minutes are up. If you've enjoyed this programme, why not try practising the new vocabulary you've learnt with our worksheet? It's available to download now from our website, bbclearningenglish.com, and you could also try out the quiz while you're there. Goodbye for now. Neil Goodbye! Next Find an A-Z list of our programmes. To learn English from news headlines, listen to Learning English from the News.  Practise your reading skills with The Reading Room.