How to Stop Repeating Unhealthy Love Patterns | Sheleana Aiyana

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• 00:00

  Hi, my name is Lewis Howes and welcome to the Daily Motivation Show.

• 00:10

  Why do you think we repeat these negative patterns in relationships so frequently?

• 00:17

  You know, we have a bad experience in one relationship.

• 00:19

  We look for someone new and then it repeats and then we do it again.

• 00:23

  And again, why does that happen for people?

• 00:24

  We're looking for a resolution.

• 00:26

  In the back of our minds, we might not even be aware of it,

• 00:29

  but we're looking for resolution to that thing that happened,

• 00:32

  or to that story that said you're not lovable,

• 00:35

  or that story that said you have to fight to earn love.

• 00:38

  Somewhere in our minds, we're looking to prove that story true,

• 00:42

  or we're looking to complete the process.

• 00:45

  And so we look for somebody who matches the template so that we can perhaps do that work.

• 00:50

  And typically, it hasn't worked out.

• 00:52

  What we don't realize is that our partner is doing that exact same thing.

• 00:55

  But with the self-awareness and the willingness piece, if we're both aware and we're like,

• 00:59

  OK, we both do have some stuff to work on here.

• 01:03

  Here's what I've got to work on.

• 01:04

  Here's what you want to work on.

• 01:05

  Do you want to do this together with that frame?

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