This is Hidden Brain. I'm Shankar Vedanta.
When things go wrong in our relationships, we often try to change the way our partners behave.
We tell ourselves that if only they would change their ways, we could be happy.
Of course, the problem is, our partners are saying the same thing about us.
Last week, we explored the power of a radically different approach.
Acceptance.
Instead of trying to change our partners,
Clark University psychologist James Cordova says there's growing evidence that we will end up in much happier relationships
if we can accept our partners for who they are.
If you missed that story, you can find it in this podcast feed.
It's titled, How to Fix Your Marriage Part 1.
Today, we look at one of the most toxic things we do in intimate relationships.
Changing this behavior is not easy, and the ideas we explore today can be a tough pill to swallow.
If the thing that we most want in our relationship is to feel that sense of love and connection and acceptance for each other,
this is my relationship.
I have to take responsibility for what happens in every moment.
Everything that I do and say matters.
How to become wiser in our relationships.
It's the latest in our Love 2.0 series this week on Hidden Brain.
So much of our distress in relationships comes about,