We learned this week that apparently Green Land is going to be a mere appetizer before the main course of the Red Planet.
We will pursue our manifest Destiny into the stars, launching American astronauts to plant the Stars and Stripes on the planet Mars.
We learned this from the second inaugural address of U.S.
president Donald Trump as he hunkered from a Washington, D.C.
winter inside the Capitol rotunda ransacked and desecrated by his fan club a little less than four years ago, and unveiled a policy program of which it may be accurately said that the conquest of Mars was not necessarily its maddest element.
We learned that the captions on maps of the Caribbean in millions of American textbooks will need to be rewritten.
A short time from now, we are going to be changing the name of the Gulf of Mexico to the Gulf.
Of America, something to keep Donald Jr.
Occupied for the next four years.
Perhaps we learned that either Trump still doesn't understand what tariffs are and how they work, or assumes his voters don't.
Instead of taxing our citizens to enrich other countries, we will tariff and tax foreign countries to enrich our citizens.
Best of luck with that, etc.
And we learn that for many years, a radical and corrupt establishment has extracted power and wealth from our citizens.
As we gather today, our government confronts a crisis of trust.
For many years, a radical and corrupt establishment has extracted power and wealth from our citizens.
See?
Although one might perhaps reasonably posit that this is somewhat lofty talk coming from someone who spent some of his final week before selflessly returning to the service of his nation floating a cryptocurrency named in honor of himself, the better to further bilk his cult out of savings, as they have not already spent on Trump shoes, Trump Bibles, and Trump guitars.
And we learned that First Lady Melania Trump, or whoever that actually is, had done the same.
Always nice to see a couple with shared interests, if not a shared home or indeed life.
Later in the week, as the restored president burbled at reporters while applying his crayon to various decrees, we learn that whatever he has spent the last four years doing, it was not undertaking remedial classes in geopolitics.