Alright, the forever ago court is now in session, please welcome the Honorable Judge Ariana.
Thank you, thank you.
You may be seated.
Today we hear the case of Dolo v.
Bagel.
Do you want to tell me your side of the story, Miss Dolo?
Yes, Judge.
It all started on a cold Monday morning.
I was born in a hospital located just beyond the Tennessee River.
No, no, no, not your whole life story.
Why are you in my courtroom today?
Oh, oh, sorry.
I'm here because that bagel over there is a fraud.
I ordered an everything bagel with everything on it,
but this bagel just had a bunch of seeds, some dried garlic and salt.
Those are the toppings on an everything bagel.
Oh yeah?
Well, where are the blueberries or the sardines or the raindrops?
An everything bagel should have everything.
I'm talking roller skates, a pterodactyl skeleton.