Happier Parents, Happier Kids Pt 1: Your Child Isn't a VIP or a Fragile Vase

更快乐的父母,更快乐的孩子第一部分:你的孩子不是贵宾或易碎的花瓶

The Happiness Lab with Dr. Laurie Santos

2022-10-31

29 分钟
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Rosy had a packed schedule of lunches, meet-ups and activities - and she was only three.  Mom Michaeleen Doucleff felt she couldn't waste a second of her daughter's time. Rosy needed to be constantly lectured and stimulated if she was going to reach the Ivy League.  This style of parenting was exhausting both mother and daughter, until Michaeleen found that not everyone approaches child-rearing in this way. She tells Dr Laurie Santos how she forged a happier and more relaxed relationship with Rosy - that benefited them both.   Formed Stanford dean Julie Lythcott-Haims explores how "overparenting" has taken hold in recent decades and why it needs to be challenged.    Further reading: Michaeleen Doucleff - Hunt, Gather, Parent: What Ancient Cultures Can Teach Us About the Lost Art of Raising Happy Helpful Humans.   Malcolm Harris - Kids These Days: Human Capital and the Making of Millennials  Julie Lythcott-Haims - How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid for Success. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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  • Pushkin.

  • I really thought parenting was what I saw on Facebook.

  • I mean, it sounds really embarrassing for me to say that.

  • Like many expectant parents,

  • journalist Michaeline Ducleff had some rather idealized notions of motherhood.

  • Like I saw the pictures of the babies and heard about moms snuggling and having this,

  • you know, incredibly romantic version of what a mom is doing.

  • And so that was what I envisioned.

  • Michaeline wanted to be the perfect mom,

  • making sure she gave her kids all the opportunities she didn't have growing up.

  • This was my opportunity to, like, create the person that I wish I had been.

  • I could have gone to Harvard or Yale and, you know,

  • I'm going to create this child that could do that.

  • I also thought that, like, I just instinctually would know how to parent.

  • But when Michaeline and her husband finally had their baby Rosie,

  • the reality wasn't quite what she had envisioned.

  • Oh my gosh, the fantasy crumbled very quickly.

  • So Rosie's a very intelligent kid.

  • I don't want to throw it under the bus.

  • She is smart and funny and really strong, but she's also super strong-willed.