You're listening to life kit from NPR.
Hey, everybody, it's Marielle.
There's this Fiona apple song that might be one of the saddest breakup tunes I've ever heard.
Like, if you're going through a breakup and you really want to wallow, put this one on.
It's called love ridden.
In it, she describes the feeling of someone turning from partner to stranger.
She calls her former lover a term of endearment baby.
And then corrects herself.
Dang.
You know, we saw each other every day.
We traveled together.
I called you baby, and now I have to just call you Bob or Barbara.
The next thing you know, we'll just be waving at each other from across the street.
This sad realization is one reason people try to stay friends with their exes.
I think sometimes it can just feel like such a loss to go from someone potentially being one of the closest people in your world to you not talking to them at all.
That feels jarring, that feels devastating.
And I think people want to lighten the weight of that loss.
That's Washington, DC based psychologist Marisa Franco.
She's a researcher and the author of the book how the science of attachment can help you make and keep Franklin.
And she says, people tell themselves, you know, if my ex and I can.